Oh, brother
by Lynette the Cowardly Lion
Summary: Tony Stark, Bruce Banner, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanova, Clint Barton, Thor and Loki Odinson are all hanging out on a Friday night when all of a sudden, Mr. Booze comes along and everyone has to take a swig. Under pressure, Loki is forced to drink some of his own and that's where everything goes downhill. Thorki.
1. Mr Booze

**Oh brother…**

Chapter Summary: Tony Stark, Bruce Banner, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanova, Clint Barton, Thor and Loki Odinson are all hanging out on a Friday night when all of a sudden, Mr. Booze comes along and everyone hast to take a swig. Under pressure, Loki is forced to drink some of his own and that's where everything goes downhill.

The bottle of various mixed alcohols was passed around the group of six, rather half-witted, teenagers, all inebriated. Clint, more inane than the others and even more absurd under the influence, yells out, "Hey, hey, hey… We should play Spin the Bottle!" he laughs, slurring his words.

The others laugh, Natasha leaning on one of Clint's shoulder, "No, no! We have stuff in the bottle!" She gulps the alcohol quickly and releases the bottle from her lips, coughing, "Let's play truth or dare."

Steve, looking half asleep (I assume he is a sleepy drunk), the alcohol obviously getting to him, "I dare… I dare Bruce to wear that lampshade for a hat!"  
Bruce laughs, taking the pink lampshade with the white fringe from Frigga's expensive-looking light, placing the girlish shade on his head. The sight caused everyone to laugh to the point of tears except for Steve who was so inebriated that he let out a soft chuckle, the closest thing he could do in his overly alcohol-sickened state. Someone really needed to call an ambulance for Mr. Rogers here.

Tony nudges Bruce's shoulder, "Looking good, hawt stuff," he laughs.

Bruce smirks and leans over to Tony so they're a mere six inches apart, "Yeah? Should I wear this more often?" He leans closer, so their noses are touching.

Tony whispers, "Bruce, it's your turn…"

Bruce whispers back, "Tony, truth or dare?"

Tony plays with Bruce's fingers, "D-Dare…"

Bruce smiles a little and whispers, putting his hands on Tony's waist, "K-Kiss me…"

Tony pulls Bruce close, clashing their lips to each other in a rough, needy first kiss. The others "whoop" at the sight, chucking. A few seconds later, the two break, gasping for air, both with blushing faces.

I lean back against the wall, closing my eyes, head tilted up and taking a deep breath. Dear lord, why must I be around these idiots? My legs curl up to my chest as I take deep, nearly heaving breaths. Why my brother forced me to come is far beyond my understanding. He knows I don't like alcohol and these blundering fools around us that he calls his 'friends.'

The game goes around the group and after Clint had to run around in his underwear, acting like an animal, I zoned out. It really wasn't worth listening to anymore.

I am almost half asleep when I hear my brother exclaim, "Loki! My brother, try this! It must be the nectar of the Gods!"

I roll my eyes, "Thor, the bitter-tasting repulsiveness that you call a beverage is really not worth trying." I scoff and roll my eyes. "Buffoons…" I say under my breath.

Tony looks at me and blinks, "Don't you talk like that!" he slurs. "You're just a… a stupid head, Loki!" I bet you're just too much of a pussy!" This was followed, of course, by a choir of "pussy" from the others in the room.

I, of course, with my pride as high as it is, take the bottle of vodka and chug a third of its contents and releasing the bottle with a loud 'pop.' The fiery substance trails down my esophagus and I can tell is dissolving my stomach lining. "F-Fuck…" I breathe out, mustering a tiny cough. "That was vile."

Clint nudges Natasha, busy drawing penises on a very unconscious Steve Rogers lying across the floor. "Wonder what kind of drunk Loki is," he laughs.

I scoff, not amused at these insolent—ugh! They got me to do exactly what they wanted. "Can I have a chaser?" I ask, wanting to get the perpetually massacring taste out of my mouth. Thor passes me the Mountain Dew and I drink from the nozzle greedily.

In what seemed like seconds, though must have been at least fifteen minutes, I'm drunk, that, I'm well aware. My vision is blurred, judgment impaired… Yeah, I'm drunk. And then before I know it, my shirt is off, displaying the small amount of muscle tissue I have on my lean body. Everyone starts whooping as the music turns on and I start dancing in the middle of the circle, my hips seem to be moving on their own. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Natasha handing Clint a couple of bills. I hear Thor yelling behind me, but I'm too into the music. I mean, really. Fuck him! Actually… Not one of my worst ideas.

I come down to Thor's level and straddle his lap, smirking. Everyone's eyes widen to the side of bowling balls. Panting a little from the dancing, I breathe, "h-hey…" and nearly purr into his ear and nibble on the lobe. I feel his pants tighten a little in a semi and my smirk widens. I kiss down his neck, nipping and licking the sensitive skin presented before me.

Clint laughs, "God, **damn**!" Loki, _dafaq are you doing_?"

Tony speaks up, "This shit is better than the porn I have Jarvis bring up!"

I can feel Thor's face heat up in a blush, "B-Brother…" he says as I start to rub his nether region, teasing the delicate bundle of nerves, which I am well aware is quite large. "Wh-What are you—"he moans, obviously trying to hold it back between clenched teeth. "Wh-What are you doing, Loki?"

I pull away from the soft skin, "Mmm… I'm pleasing you, Thor. I always thought you were attractive." I smirk and rip open the buttons on his shirt, revealing the well-defined muscles hidden underneath it. "Dear god…" I lick my lips hungrily, taking in the sight.

I clash our lips together and kiss him, throwing my arms around his strong shoulders and pulling him close, rubbing our crotches together, grinding on him. I moan into his mouth and lick his lips, which he finally grants me permission with. Thank god he's drunk too.

Our tongues wrestle in a fight that I end up losing, not that I really mind. God, Thor's a good kisser. He pulls off my shirt quickly and he shows me a quick glance of uncertainty, then a really, really hot smirk… He jams a hand down my trousers and grabs my organ and I moan loudly, "Th-Thor, fuck!" I close my eyes tightly and wrap my legs around his waist.

He pulls his hand out of my pants with a whine of protest I find coming from my mouth. He purrs in my ear, "Let's take this to my room." And I nod quickly, holding myself tighter on him. He grabs my ass and takes us to his bedroom where he lays me on the bed and unbuttons and unzips his pants quickly, and I do the same. Within seconds, we find each other in nothing but our birthday suits.

I look at his member and blush, "D-Do you have lube?"

He shakes his head, so I shrug and take as much of his member as I can in my mouth, sucking on it hard, bobbing my head, lubricating it with my own saliva. His hands find themselves entwined in my hair as he lets out soft moans of pleasure. I pull away from it as bits of precum dribble out of the small slit.

He puts a few fingers in front of my mouth, motioning me to suck them. I do so greedily, coating the three fingers with as much as I can. He pulls them out of my mouth and slips one of the fingers into my entrance.

I adjust easily to the one and then two… But during the third, a small whine escapes my lips, a mixture of pain and pleasure rocking my body. He moves the few fingers around, scissoring them, until he finds that magical spot, making my eyes widen and I hear myself scream in pleasure, arching my back.

He smirks and removes his fingers and before I have time to protest, jams that throbbing cock into me, within a couple thrusts, he finds the spot again, aiming for it each time, and by god, hitting it every fucking time. I scream and moan his name, crying from the pain and pleasure writhing through my body. Oh, god… Soon enough we cum in sync, my seed getting all over both of our chests, both of us panting, sweating messes, that collapse from exhaustion within minutes of touching the pillows.

* * *

**Don't mind this if it's a bad smex scene owo I'm sorry, it's the first one I ever wrote, so yeah… Mind my immaturity xD**


	2. The Morning After

The Next Morning

I wake up with a start. Straight out of bed despite my blistering headache. I swear, my head hurts so bad.. I could assassinate Obiwan Kenobi without even god damn help from the mother fucking force! Holy shit, fuck, fuck, bitch, fuck, fuck!

I... I never have headaches. What the fuc-my eyes open wide, wincing slightly at the light-filled room. There I see Thor, in just his boxers, leaning against he wall with a frustrated glare pointed directly at myself.

I blink, "What did I do? Fuck... What am I doing in your room-holy shit." We-oh god-we fucked. My brother and I had sex.. And by god it was wonderful... Fuck, what am I thinking?! Chill, Loki!

"Get out. Now." He says angrily. I've never seen him angry. He's always so exhuberant and kind... Oh god, he hates me. Thor hates me. Maybe I wasn't good in bed... Maybe it's just because I'm his brother and we...

My eyes water. Fuck, I just lost my virginity to Thor. And it wasnt good for him. And it was... More than amazing for me. Thor's glare hardens, "Loki, out."

I pick myself out of the bed, only his sheets covering what little of my dignity I have left."D-Do you have my clothes?" I ask, shakily.

He throws the articles of clothing at me. "Wash the sheet and have mother bring it back to me." He nearly growls.

I nod and slowly walk back into my room, fighting back unwarranted tears. Why... Why is this tearing me up so badly? I shouldn't be sad. I should be furious, outraged. I just slept with my brother. And yet, I want for him to have enjoyed it. I mean, fuck! I'm fucked! What of he never wants to see me again? I can't deal with that..

I cry. Because I'm in love with my brother.k

* * *

**Sorry to all! This was a really short chapter, but I kinda wanted it to be centred on Loki's morning after thoughts c: **

**Quin611:** I hope you enjoyed c:

**Janet1982:** I have a very set way on where I want this to go c: I hope you'll enjoy it -greater than three-

**Darkshadowarchfiend:** I hope this was worth waiting for c;


	3. Thor

Thor:

I bury my face into my pillow-well, Loki's pillow-and cry. It smells like him-dear lord, like honey and vanilla. He's wonderful, perfect. I can't... He's my brother. My dear brother should not take my breath away like this. It's stupid, it's frustrating, and I can't deal with this any more! It's better if I just... I need to let this crush die as it stands. But it's so hard, especially after last night. It's not fair! I can't help wanting him...

I pick myself I from the pillow and clean myself up, plastering a fake smile on my face. This has been common occurrence for me ever since Loki was ten years old. I've been crazy about him ever since we were children. And now he just graduated high school. I should be proud. But I'm scared-sickened. I don't want to live without him. And now he can just leave and find someone twice as wonderful as me.

I take a few deep breaths, splash some water on my face and go downstairs where I find the others passed out on the ground. I kick his ribcage lightly, "Hey, wake up."

I watch Steve whine and bury his face into a pillow, "Go 'way."

I sigh, "Rogers, get out... My mother is due home any time."

He whines, yet throws the pillow at a shirtless Natasha and Clint, tangled around her. Eventually we have everyone woken up and grumpy. Except Tony, who is too busy making "you fucked your brother" jokes that are really making me sick.

Natasha, being Natasha, noticed this and pulled me to the other room. "Thor, are you okay? Something is wrong."

I blink,"Well, I just fucked my brother and have a bastardly hangover."

She rolls her eyes, "Thor, don't play stupid with me. I know that you love Loki. I've known that for a long time. You're not mad that you had sex with Loki. You're just mad you let yourself."

I go silent. How could she have... How could she have known?

Natasha nods. "I know I'm right. And you do too. If you need anything, you can let me know, okay?"

* * *

Frigga walks over to her husband in the hotel room with a cup of coffee for him exactly how he likes it."H-Hey, Odin..." She says, biting her lip.

Odin sips his coffee, smiling a little. "What's wrong, sweetheart? You've been acting strange ever since Loki graduated."

She looks down, guilty. "Odin, we need to tell Loki. It's time." She says with much sadness in her voice.

Odin takes a deep breath, "N-Not now, Frigga, we can't."

* * *

**None of you has a right to complain about short chapters because I'm posting twice in the same day. Yay! No life!**

**Halfasleepwriter:** I hope your curiosity was fulfilled c:

**Lilemonkeo92**: Oh my god, I know. I was crying when I wrote it. But then again, I'm a huge baby:c


	4. Two Weeks

Two Weeks.

It's been two weeks. Two terrible, sickening, maddening weeks of nothing but pure, inhumane torture. My brother hates me that I'm sure. My heart is being constantly wretched from it's now hollow cavern to my sheer demise. This… I can't deal with this. I can't, I love… I love Thor Odinson. I love my brother. The one who taught me how to tie my shoes, the one who kissed my bruises after I jammed them in the door time and time again, the one who cuddled me when I had my nightmares every night, the one who beat up the bullies after they drenched me in milkshake remnants, the one who filled my heart with good, the one who smiled at me just for the spite of doing so. I love him, and it can never—nay, will never—happen.

It's been two weeks since Thor and I drank on that very eventful night and I have heard not a word from him since he yelled at me to get out. I have not received one of his charming smiles. I have not even been in his line sight more than twice. He hates me… I might as well have… I might as well have raped him. But since I was under the influence too, he can't, but I bet he wants to more than anything… He hates me. I can't deal with this. I'd rather be dead. And so it will be. For his and my own sake, he never has to see me again, for I know it reminds him of his and my mistake.

_Dear Thor,_

_You're to be disgusted by the contents of this letter, I'm sure. But I must get it out before I die, and I can't leave you with nothing. It's against my nature of loving you. Yes, Thor, I love you. I want to shout it at the top of my lungs, cry it to the world. But I know that you wouldn't want that, so I would never. I just… I needed to get that out, I'm truly sorry, brother. The events that happened should not have ever taken place, and rest assured I know this more than anyone. They were wrong, they were senseless, but really, I loved it. Thor, you are my one and only love, though I know it is not resembled by you and I'm okay with that. I've been okay with that. I'm just going to swallow what little of my pride and dignity I have left and just take a leap. A long, endless leap, I won't wake up and I don't care. This is it for me, Thor. Meet someone pretty, smart, good for you. That girl Jane really likes you, y'know. You can try and see if she's the one. Have a good life, Thor. You deserve it. _

* * *

And so, Loki Odinson jumped off the top of the building, head first, the note weighing heavy in his pocket, anchoring him to the paved ground. And this… This was the end of Loki.

**Ohh!~ Another short chapter. But I wanted it to be a total cliffhanger, so yeah, Loki is dead:c 5 comments on this chapter needed for the next one x3**


	5. Loki's Night

Loki's night

Frigga walked out of her car, a tiny Honda Civic she was all too fond of, and started to go up to their apartment at the top floor. Today was the day, she decided. The day she would tell Loki of his true origins. "Fuck Odin," she thought. "Loki needs to know. I know Odin cares more for Thor, I mean, he is his true son, and yet it still infuriates me. I want my son to grow up normally despite his adoption."

She ran up the stairway to Loki's room, "Loki? Sweetheart, where are you?"she glances around the room, and then finally at the open window facing the pool facilities. "Loki?!" She yells outside it, knowing Loki hates the cold. "Oh my god.." She looks down at the crowd people screaming, crying outside right underneath Loki's room. "Oh god, oh god, oh god," running through her head like a mantra as she ran down the stairway quickly, yelling, "Loki!" at the top of her lungs, tears spilling from her eyes.

She made her way through the crowd of people, "Loki, Loki is that you, baby?!" She pushes her way through to see the foiled remains of Loki Odinson. She gasps at the blood splattered body, his femur obviously spilt directly in half, for she could see the bone sticking out, his arm was broken at an odd angle and his head was split in half, blood oozing from the recesses of his ebony hair. She cries, tears streaming down her face, "Oh god, Loki! Why aren't you bastards calling fucking nine-one-one, for fucks sake?!" The crowd of people start calling for an ambulance as Frigga cradled her son's shattered remains. "M-My baby.." she sobs.

Thor hearing his mother's voice screaming obscenities, he made his way outside rather quickly, especially after hearing the ambulance's wails. "M-Mother?!" he yells. Frigga's head snaps to her son, tears flowing down her ivory face.

"M-Mother, what happened?" Thor demanded as he pulls his weeping mother into an embrace.

Frigga cries, "L-Loki... Loki jumped! I-I knew... I knew something was going on! B-But not this drastic!" she wails. "M-My baby is dying!"

Thor's eyes expand to twice their size, stunned. "L-Loki... H-He tried to k-kill himself?" He stuttered.

Frigga nods furiously, "Th-This is all my fault! I-I should have known! I-I should have seen-"

A paramedic cuts Frigga off, "Ma'am, if you want to go in the ambulance with your son, you need to calm down."

Frigga tries to do so unsuccessfully. "Th-Thor, go with him, I-I can't even... I'll have Mrs. Carlos take me t-to the hospital."

Thor nods quickly, tears refusing to spill. "A-Alright, mother..." He gets in the ambulance quickly, stunned to see the nature of Loki's condition. "O-Oh god... Loki, how could you do this to yourself, Loki? Wh-Why?" He holds Loki's hand tightly, letting a few tears spill.

"L-Loki, you need to wake up, okay?" He squeezes his hand. "Y-You can survive this, Loki. I know. You're the strongest person I've ever met, by god, I'm not going to lose you!"

_I can hear them. I can hear him. My pocket, Thor. My pocket. Put the pieces together, brother. Let me die. I'm surprised you even came, Thor. But ohmygodhesholdingmyhand. A very small gasps emits from my lips. Can he hear me? Why can't I move? I need to get my ass up and jump out of this god damn ambulance! Let me die! I can't... I don't want to live anymore. That was supposed to be the end of me. Let me starve to death, I don't care. Just don't let me live on like this. Am I a vegetable? Am I going to be forced to live n this indignant hellhole of a shell? Is this my punishment for loving my brother?_

**Please, please dont be mad for le short chapter:c I'm on vacation so you're lucky I'm posting at all xD Don't kill me c: Love you all!**


	6. Hospitals Smell Like Love

Hospitals Smell Like Romance, through the EKG of course.

The doctors walk into be waiting room, "Frigga and Thor Odinson?" The two stand up quickly. Please join us in the other room." The two nod, speechless, yet following the trio of doctors.

Frigga blurts out the question running through both her and Thor's heads, "I-Is my baby okay?!"

The three doctors look at each other, then back at the two. "I'm sorry to both of you," one starts. "Loki Odinson is in a coma with no sign of escaping it soon." The other doctors seem melancholy but Thor doubts if the three really do care. God damn doctors... They've seen so many similar cases, they're immune to the misfortune around them.

Thor speaks up, "May we see him?"

The doctors look back and forth between each other once again, "Mr. Odinson, right now we don't think that's a good idea. Morale needs too be boosted and a visit may-"

Thor interrupts him, "Morale is gone, doctor! I need to see my brother!"

The three nod glumly. "One at a time, Mrs. Odinson, you'd be the first." Frigga nods and follows the doctor into Loki's hospital room.

One of the remaining doctors addresses Thor, "This was for you... It was in his pocket." He hands Loki's uncharacteristically messy letter to Thor.

Thor grabs the sheet of parchment quickly, reading its contents with watery eyes, willing himself not to break into a sob, "Crying is weak, " his father always said. "It belongs to those with a false sense of the world. Never be one of those, my son." He slumped to the ground, trying to process the contents of the paper. He thinks to himself, "M-My brother Loki loves me. And I'm the cause of his... Suicide. If I hadn't abandoned him and just told Loki of my... Infatuation with him, expressed myself. Fuck, Loki! I'm so sorry!" Tears stream down his face as he continued mentally scolding himself, "My brother and I have been... Well, loving each other for years and I fucked it over!"

The doctor sits down next to him, biting his lip nervously, "M-Mr. Odinson-"

The man shakes his head. "Thor, call me Thor."

The doctor nods, "Well, Thor, I'm Doctor Coulson, and it's err.. Lovely to meet you."

Thor nods.

Doctor Coulson continues, "Well, based on hospital procedures, I had to read the note, I know what happened Thor. His blood told your story with alcohol and this note tells the rest. And judging by your reaction, you feel the same."

Thor shakes his head quickly, "N-No, of course not!" He stutters. "Loki is my brother!"

Coulson tilts his head, wondersome and curious, "You don't know?"

Thor snaps his head up , "Kn-Know what exactly?"

"Loki is your adopted brother, Thor. A relationship would be completely legal."

Thor's eyes widen in realisation, letting Doctor Coulson's words sink in. "I-It was legal this whole time? H-He's not really my brother?"

Coulson shakes his head, "U-Unfortunately, this whole situation was highly avoidable."

Thor broke down in a sob, of bad and a very few good tears, the flood of anguish coming over him, pulling the blond into a fit of solemnity. "I-Im so stupid!" He cries, trying to will himself to stop. "L-Loki wouldn't be fucking brain dead if I wasn't such a god damn pussy!"

Coulson, being the sympath he is, pulls Thor into an embrace, letting Thor's tears fall onto his lab coat, a simple gesture Odin would outright refuse to do, and here Coulson was, being a bigger support beam for Thor than his own father.

"I-I need to see him." Thor says, picking his head up and wiping his clumped eyelashes.

Coulson nods once, "I'll notify Director Fury to clear the room for you." He has the man shoo the others out and Thor is shoved in.

There Loki laid, connected to what looked like a heart monitor, a respirator, an IV feeding tube and a few other machines Thor wasn't quite sure of what they were.

His leg and arm were both in solid white casts, since colour was not a preference. His head was taped up and his nose was severely bruised-not that the rest of him wasn't plenty bruised, because by god it was, his nose was just worse-and scrapes were coating his ivory skin.

Coulson studies Thor's shocked face, "H-He also broke three ribs... Loki was minutes from dying when he arrived." The doctor added in quietly.

"Really, I was that close?" Loki thought bitterly."Whose here this time?" He mentally groans.

Thor closes his watering eyes, clearing his throat. "I know that sound!" Loki thought, now suddenly enthused. "Thor, I'm alive!" he wanted to scream, yearning for some sense.

Thor walked by his bedside, "Can he hear me?" Thor asked Coulson, voice quivering slightly.

Coulson nods, "Yeah, if he's awake, he can hear, feel and smell. He just can't physically react to them."

Thor nods and attaches his hand to Loki's, interlocking their fingers, "Hey, Loks'," he says quietly.

Loki's head is spinning. "Dear God," he thinks. "I haven't heard his voice in weeks!" His inner self screams, imagining Thor's beauty.

Thor squeezes his hand lightly, "I have so much to talk to you about, brother. But I guess for starters, I read your letter..."

Loki's heart sinks, "Oh god, oh god, oh god. He's going to confront me on this before I can even cry." His heart aches even more.

Thor runs his fingers through Loki's long hair, "Loki, I... I have quite the crush on you too." Thor kisses Loki softly on the cheek and Loki starts floating.

"Ohmygodohmygodohmygodhehasac rushonmewhatthefuckhelikesme backohmygodohmygodiminheaven !" His inner voice screams as the EKG monitor spikes up and the steady "Beep... Beep... Beep..." goes to a "beep, beep, beep!" Thor chuckles his musical laughter and Loki's cheeks blush a scarlet red.

Thor pets Loki's hair, soothing him. "Don't worry, Loki, you may not be able to tell, but I am acting the same."

Loki's lips form a very small smile and Thor glances at Coulson, smiling profusely.

"Uhm, Loki... We have one more thing to discuss... We're well, brothers."

Loki's inner self starts freaking out, "But Thor, you still want me right?!" His breathing hitches a bit.

Thor rubs small circles on his arm, "Shh... Shh. It is something we need to talk about. Mother should've told the two of us sooner, but I guess you're not actually my brother... Mother adopted you when you were young. I-I'm so sorry, brother. I-I just found out myself. I-If I wasn't such a coward, you'd be able to respond to me." He buries his face into Loki's arm. "Y-You're still part of the family. I swear, brother. M-Mother and Father love you very much. A-And you're still part of my family too. Though I would like to be a more romantic figure in your life... Instead of a brother. I've felt this way ever since I was ten years old. And by god, you're the only one I've ever felt this way for. It is an honour to see these words you said on this sheet of paper. You need to wake up soon, Loki. Because I would love to hear it instead of read it." He kisses his hand softly, "I'll never leave your bedside, I promise. I'll be here waiting for you to awaken."

**And just so you know, this was like, twelve pages in my notebook, so be grateful:p Hawaii is wonderful, if anyone's wondering! Aloha! **

**Guest**: Of course! I hope you get to read this chapter! Get an account and favourite the story, hon c:

**No way: **Oh my god, I do the same thing. I download the stories onto my Nook and I'm reading the whole day. We can be buddies:3

**Ashley Leann:** Will you ever forgive me?ono

** .3:** Was this up to par, hunny? I hope so c:

**Rodacoma**: PLEASE DON'T KILL ME! Or well, eat me! I'm not delicious I swear!

**Erun1**: Will do c:

**Desartrose**: is this long enough? D: I'm on an iPod! It's hard with auto correct.

**Kokorospice**: I update a lot D:

**I want to thank all my reviewers and followers, just being able to see feedback is a lovely thing, it helps with my story making process and constructive criticism is HIGHLY encouraged. It really keeps me on my toes. If you suggest something within reason, chances are, it will happen c: Oh and If you give me some of that sweet stuff, I'll love you too. With loove, xTheKidWhoKilledTheDancefloo rx**


	7. The Last Night

**Disclaimer; I do not own any of the Avengers characters. The italicised pieces are lyrics of the song "The Last Night" by Skillet. Each point of view shift is a new day, and mind you there are a lot of them. This chapter may get confusing and if that's the case, I'm sorry! (You can comment and tell me about it c;)**

* * *

Loki's been out for a total of eleven days that I can't make up to him. God, I'm a coward. I found out he was hurting himself too, straight to jagged scars made his arms a mosaic artwork. Mother and I had always wondered how he could wear long sleeved shirts in the middle of summer. All he was doing for so many years was hurt himself, to the point where it became a major coping skill for the boy. I'll keep him safe, I'll do all I can to keep him safe. Here and later. Because that's what a good boyfriend, brother, friend does.

_You come to me with scars on your wrists_

_You tell me this will be the last night feeling like this._

He... He found out the other day. He found the scars, the scabs. He cried. God, I made Thor cry again. He doesn't know about it all. How much it hurt to see him with Jane, how father always looked down on me disapprovingly, how I had to deal with all the whispers about me in the school hallways, how I got beat up by his dear 'friends' everyday at four, how I cried in bed, due to nightmares shredding my dream world and tearing my being to pieces., how I had to fake a smile everyday. Maybe it'd be better if I were dead. I don't even have a real family.

_Just came to say goodbye, _

_Didn't want you to see me cry,_

_I'm fine._

_**But I know it's a lie!**_

I grasp Loki's hands and kiss the scarred and healing tissue, hoping my slightly grizzled face doesn't hurt his delicate flesh. I can't believe he did this, he deserves better. A better I hope to bring him if he forgives me. If he wants me to hold him, he will be held, if wants to cry, I'll offer him open arms, if he wants me gone, I'll leave...

_This is the last night you'll spend alone!_

_Look me in the eye so I know you know,_

_I'm everywhere you want me to be._

He promised to stand by me, be my night in shining armour. He said he'll protect me. Keep me safe, from even myself. As if it were possible. God, he's perfect. If only I could see his beautiful face... I'd be the happiest man alive. Except for the fact that I would be alive. I don't know if I could. What if it all disappears? You can't lean on anybody. Especially to solve your problems.

_This is the last night you'll spend alone. _

_I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go._

_I'm everything you need me to be._

He's the best thing I've ever known. Good things need to be kept happy, because God knows they deserve it. One day, I know his suffering won't be for any reason. And I'll be there every step of the way. I don't have to be his lover, I don't have to be his brother. If he needs, I'll be his friend, even his god damn landlord.

_Your parents say everything is your fault. _

_But they don't know you like I know you_

_They don't know you at all_

I can't wake up. I wake up, that means Odin. Odin smacking me down to the ground, Odin kicking my ribs in when I'm down, Odin kneeing me in the groin because I'm gay. And saying if I told anyone, I would destroy our family, I'd lose my father. Thor would lose his father. And even if I do attempt to tell someone, I'm good as dead.

_I'm so sick of when they say,_

_It's just a phase _

_You'll be okay _

_Your fine._

**_But I know it's a lie!_**

Loki has always been a good pretender, pretending that he's okay, pretending that he hates me, pretending that life is all that and a bag of cherry blossoms. He's my brother, I should've known better than this. I'm not worth his forgiveness, but I hope he forgives me anyways, because Loki is well-magical.

_This is the last night you'll spend alone,_

_Look me in the eye so I know you know_

_I'm everywhere you want me to be._

I want to hold onto Thor tightly and tell him everything, cry in his arms for hours. I hate myself. I hate myself for putting up with Odin, for getting drunk that night, for hurting myself, loving Thor... I don't deserve his sorries, I have to apologise to him. I need to wake up, but I can't. I wake up and I'm good as dead.

_This is the last night you'll spend alone_

_I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go_

_In everything you want me to be._

_This is the last night away from me_

I cling onto Loki's arm, praying to any and m the gods to awaken him. Faith, please do me some good. I'm trying, I'm trying so hard. I love him so much. I can't lose the shining star in my night sky... Or I'll be lost. Maybe I'll tell him that someday. It's romantic, I think.

_The night is so long _

_When everything's wrong _

_If you give me your hand_

_I will help you hold on._

_Tonight... Tonight!_

It been 23 days since I tried to off myself. I'm not sure if I'm happy about it or not. I want to be able to see Thor smile. Maybe he'll kiss me. Maybe I can tell him everything and then be dead the next day, before Odin does. Maybe. Maybe the hospital will just take me off life support. Thor promises me things, almost trying to coax me out of the coma. It doesn't work that way, beautiful. I'm sorry.

_This is the last night you'll spend alone_

_Look me in the eye so I know you know_

_I'm everywhere you want me to be._

My hands are yours and yours alone to hold. My eyes are yours and only yours to gaze into. My smile is caused by you and only you. I love you, Loki Laufeyson. You are truly one to behold, Lord knows. Thank you for blessing me with this Loki. You're perfect, a fantasy and you can't be that as you're in a comatose state. Maybe that's another of the reasons why you committed this act, to not have to deal with the need of perfection. Anyways I look at it, I add another thing onto his shoulders. I truly am a terrible being.

_This is the last night you'll spend alone_

_I'll wrap you in my arms and I won't let go_

_I'm everything you need me to be._

He makes me think all is good in the world, Thor you are my rock, my gem, and you have granted me with so much, never leaving my side and staying with me for all these days-it's been twenty five and you have yet to leave, Thor, you're wonderful. Thank you darling. You mean more to me than time can tell.

_I won't let up say goodbye,_

_I'll be your reason why._

Day 26 and not leaving soon. I've been with him all these days, talking to him, reading to him. I hope he enjoys the presence I give him.

Loki has nightmares from what I can tell. I try to help soothe him, stroking his hair, holding him tightly, "Sh-Shh, Loks, it's just a dream, you're okay now, I promise," I would tell him, placing a chaste kiss on his cheek. "It's okay..." He calmed down and lagged stiffly in his arms, as I would expect him to.

"God, he's so beautiful," I thought, tracing his facial features. "So incredibly beautiful." I placed a soft kiss on his plump lips and closed my eyes. "Snow White, if you would awaken now.." I thought bitterly to myself, turning away from the sleeping figure, eyes watering a bit, muttering, "'man up!" to myself under my breath, staring out the window.

"I-Im sorry, Loki, that was out of line, e-even for me." I looked down at the bird perched on its nest, a black bird with a golden beak, reminding me of Loki.

And then I heard its song, "Wh-Why are you apologising?" said a soft voice from behind me.

_I won't let you say goodbye,_

_I'll be your reason why._

_This is your last night,_

_Away from me._

* * *

**Authors notes:** Just me and my review whoreness. Comment with an idea, really! It could happen! I mean, I'm open to try anything, well, with a degree of sensical-ness, of course. c:

**Ashley LeAnn**: re: Omfg my heart breaks in a sad beautiful way with this chapter. Lookingh forward to lokis road to recovery. Keep going!

Wasn't planning on going anywhere! Glad you like it, darling!

**Erun1:** re: Yesh! Such sadness! Such uhhh...drama! And an inner Loki, lol, he should keep that when he gets out of this. Please update sooonn!

Is this fast enough of an update c; You know that's an excellent idea though, inner Loki stays!:3

**A special thanks to**; _HalfAsleepWriter, Igotthemoveslikejagger, Iz-Insane, Just another time-lord, M.S DARK ANGEL, PillowLover, .3, lycanus1, Asrial, Ebony-chi, Erun1, Foxwolfmoon, KokoroSpice, Pandamuetze, Pure-at-Heart-but-in-Soul, PurplexKitty14, Sesshomaru-XD-13, Tony's-Loki, animewolf1176, desartrose, janet1982, lost-sentiments, vaderjdi14, and xelloss100_


End file.
